Considering Suicide?
If you are considering suicide, then you are obviously suffering from depression. Try to keep in mind that this is not a unique thing and that most people deal with this at some time in their life. The fact that you are thinking about suicide means that your depression is serious, so you need to take some serious steps to deal with it. First of all, if you haven’t read the “How to get to Heaven in 10 minutes” discussion on this web site, go ahead and do that right now. It really only takes about 10 minutes or less to read, and will give you a more eternal perspective on life.
So you are depressed which means you are probably dealing with boredom, loneliness, family or work stress, health problems or any number of other issues that are bringing you down. As much as we would like to think that someone out in the world is going to help us out of a situation, the truth of the matter is that the one person on this earth that is going to help you most to get out of the situation is yourself. I hope that there is someone in your life that can help you through this situation, but if not, you will be able to do it yourself. The fact that you are looking to the web for answers means that you want a solution to this issue which is a good start.
Try to keep in mind that if you are in a down period in your life right now, then it is likely that things will take a turn for the better in the future. If what you are doing right now isn’t working to get you out of your depressed state, then you need to make concrete changes to make things happen for the better.
Let’s start with the basics. A lot of people see improvement in their mental health just by improving their physical state. This is a pretty broad statement, so let me break it down a little more. If you feel bad about your body, then start making changes to improve it. Exercising will not only make you feel better about yourself, but a lot of people get into a focused “zone” when they exercise which helps them forget about all things but what they are doing. If you know anything about “runners high” you can relate to this.
Consider your eating habits too. Alcohol, caffeine drinks, sweet foods and drinks/junk food all contribute to mood swings just by changing your physiology. Also a lack of B-vitamins can have a serious effect on your overall mood. Consider a B-Vitamin supplement. You should also check the web for other natural nutritional supplements that may help you out.
So how do you deal with the big issues in your life that are bringing you down such as boredom, loneliness and stress? There is no magical answer except that you need to take these issues on and not just hope that they will go away.
Loneliness:
This may be one of the biggest contributors to depression. You may have very little control of your family relationships or specifically the number of relationships in your family. You may just not have that many relatives to begin with, or your relationships with your family are pretty damaged and may be difficult or impossible to repair. A lot of people may need to concentrate on developing new friendships. For a shy person, this is going to be a greater challenge then for an outgoing person, but you are still going to have to take charge of the situation. People are probably not going to come knocking on your door, so you need to make this happen. Get a list of people around you that seem like they would be good potential friends (people you work with, go to school with, see at the gym or church or any place that you spend time at). Work and school are probably the places where most people spend a significant amount of time, so these are the most obvious options. If you are not working or in school, then you will need to start some new activities where you actually have an opportunity to meet people. Find activities or meet up groups (see www.meetup.com) that you enjoy so that you can be around people with similar interests to yours. Check out your park district programs, community college, volunteering, etc.
You can also rekindle friendships from people from your past that you’ve lost touch with, or people you occasionally hang out with but haven’t spend a lot of time with.
Now that you are around people, start talking. You don’t have to talk to people with the goal to become lifelong buddies, just say hello, start a conversation about something simple that you both are experiencing. At some point, you will start making connections with people. The next step is to invite them to do something.
See: www.succeedsocially.com for more (good) information and details on meeting people and dealing with shyness.
Boredom:
The main contributor to boredom is most likely a lack of structure in your life. If you are not working (homemaker or working away from the house) or in school, you probably have way too much free time, and no way to fill it. You need to have a reason to get up in the morning and some productive activity to occupy your time. If you are unable to work or go to school for some reason, try volunteering. If you are able to work or go to school, then get to it.
As noted above, finding new activities, and hanging around people will help you with loneliness, but these activities will also help fill your time to combat boredom.
We all have tasks in life that are mundane, but still must be done. We may even have jobs that are mundane (and we still have to go to work). So what can you do to make these large chunks of time more interesting? The short answer to is to absorb yourself in your activities whether they are mundane or fun. You need to make these tasks a challenge, have goals at your job, no matter what the job is, and then do your best to succeed at them.
Something else that you can do is just take a more intimate interest in the things that are around you. If you are walking, look intently at the buildings, trees, birds, etc and notice the interesting things you have probably walked past your whole life. Try to live in the moment and enjoy the details of the moment no matter where you are.
Stress:
We live in an imperfect world where things go wrong and people can be mean or downright evil. If you have some amount of responsibility for another person, you will need to deal with their problems as well as your own. Things go wrong at work, cars break down, people lose their jobs, and see their health diminish. Life is a challenge and at some point, you will have to deal with problems. The good news is that whatever the problem is, you probably have some control over the solution. Don’t let the situation overwhelm you, instead take charge of the problem or even get mad at the problem and resolve to get through it. Look for alternate solutions to the problem other than what may seem like the obvious path.
Do you have unattainable goals that are stressing you out? It might be time to reassess so that you have realistic expectations in your life. If you are striving for a life with a lot of money, you may be burning yourself out to attain money that probably won’t’ bring you happiness in the long run anyway.
Manage the stressful situation one task at a time. Trying to solve a problem all at once is probably impossible, but dealing with one task at a time is something that you can do, and may help to make the situation less intimidating as you complete some small task. Just making a plan (write it down) to deal with the situation will let your mind see that there is a solution. If your stress is not on one particular item, but just having too many things to do, then get organized. Make a list of what items need to be dealt with, and deal with them one at a time. You will probably decide that a lot of the items on your list weren’t worth worrying about in the first place.
Take a breather and give your mind a chance to relax. Remove yourself from the situation and clear your head. You will probably come up with some ideas for solutions when your mind is clear and you stop focusing on the problem. Get out and exercise. This will help your body to cleanse itself of stress hormones. Get some sleep and eat good food. Do a web search for “acupressure for stress relief.” You may be surprised at how well it can give you some quick relief.
Lots of people go through stressful times and eventually look back on them as turning point in their life that led them to something better. Lose your job? This might be the opportunity to explore a new career that is more exciting for you. Taking a job with less pay may mean you have to get rid of some of the luxuries in your life, but simplifying your life might be better for you in the long run anyway.
Whatever the stressful situation, ask yourself is there a lesson to be learned here? God may be trying to get your attention to teach you something you need to know. If your health is taking a turn for the worse, you are much more likely to be compassionate to people who have physical or mental ailments. Look for a lesson in the situation that you are experiencing.
We’ve all gone through stressful times in our lives. As you look back on them you will notice that at some point in time you got through the situation and things improved. Whatever you are going through now will eventually come to a point where the situation is resolved, and someday you will look back on this situation and realized you got through it. Try to put yourself in the future mentally and know that things will get better.
The big issue:
Let’s get to a serious issue that usually isn’t talked about. God wants you to be happy and live life to the fullest, but God’s enemy is Satan, and he wants to draw you away from God. Satan isn’t a made up character like the Easter Bunny but a fallen angel that wants to do everything he can to lead people away from God’s plan for their lives. If Satan can keep you depressed or even get you to kill yourself, he has a chance to keep you from doing good in your life, or even worse keep you from knowing God and finding salvation and a future in heaven.
Satan is real; he is a fallen angel that wants to be like God. The good news is that eventually God will defeat Satan. The bad news is that God has allowed Satan to have some amount of power in this world, but anyone who believes in Jesus and His power has the ability to deal with Satan.
So how do you deal with Satan? First of all, know that God is more powerful than Satan, so ask God to keep Satan out of your life and give you strength to overcome him and your depression. Being able to use the power of God to keep Satan away is not a simple as just speaking some magical incantation. You must first be a believer in Jesus Christ in order to have this power available to you, and you must be living in a proper relationship with Jesus. As noted in the Bible, James 4:7 “Submit yourselves, then to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” Keep in mind that life on this earth is temporary and that God may be allowing you to go through a tough time in your life for a number of reasons. Being saved/Christian does keep Satan from trying to affect your life. If you are saved, your place in heaven is secure, but Satan still wants to keep you from being an effective Christian and keep your from helping others know about Jesus.
First, if you don’t believe in Jesus, going through a difficult time may be God’s way of forcing you to realize that you can’t make it through this life on your own power. You need God’s strength to deal with life. You need Jesus for salvation and the opportunity to spend eternity in heaven.
Finally, don’t be afraid to ask for help either a professional counselor or just talk to someone who will listen. It is nothing to be ashamed about, and talking with someone will likely bring you some relief, give you some hope, or lead you to the steps to get some relief. If you have someone that can help with the situation, don’t be afraid to ask. You will probably be surprised by how much other people will be willing to help you out.
Questions? email gregj3247@gmail.com
Also, see thehopeline.com for help.